I feel like I could’ve done better last week, just in general, about everything. Plus some things that came up really got me thinking about life decisions and stuff, and how I have to remind myself that however you live your life is valid, and the privilege of being able to choose what you do with your life… but this is in the context of the opportunity cost of decisions. Lol, I’m rambling.
It’s easy to blame social media because we can so easily, quantifiably, compare our lives from other people’s lives but that has always existed. I’ve always felt compared to others in everything. It’s social nature, and I think it made me both indifferent to other people’s opinion of me and also competitive, if that makes sense.
Clicking this article about ~scientific study of effectiveness re: audiobooks vs reading things for yourself. The easily digestible result is, it’s inconclusive but what I took away from it (what matters most, IMO) is that it doesn’t matter if you’re reading for pleasure.
Drinking still a lot of water. I really have been drinking at least 2 liters a day since I bought that Tupperware tumbler (I love it, I swear by it, you can buy something sturdy and for cheap on Lazada) that before I used to think it’s a lot of water to have to remember to drink, but now I feel like I could / should drink more. I like that I’m keeping some kind of good habit regular.
Eating nothing interesting, although there is this brand of rosemary-flavored chips you can buy (expensively, for chips) at 7-Eleven that mom got me hooked on. I’m a little sad that while I cooked constantly last year, I don’t think I’ve made anything food-wise this year.
Feeling like I need to pee (lol) but the bathrooms are occupied. (If this is TMI, I just remind myself that this meme is supposed to be candid and a little silly). I also feel annoyed that at my age I still let my parents coerce me into going to church, or guilt me when I don’t. Thanks for the lifetime of Catholic guilt, church!
Hoping I get everything I want done by Tuesday to be done by then. I’ve worked it out that if hustle in the next 1.5 days, I can buy myself three days of peace to just read the new Cormoran Strike book (seeing as it’s literally the only book I read, it’s like an event for me. Lol.)
Listening to JVN’s podcast, some episodes of which I liked. I think if I didn’t enjoy his personality, I would find him a grating host. He goes off tangent constantly and talks over his guests non-stop. But he is curious, which is a quality I know I don’t have much of, and am trying to practice more. There was also an episode of Thirst Trap on Lee Pace (aforementioned love of my life. Lol.) and it was fun. I don’t think I’d enjoy it if I don’t thirst for their Man of the Week.
Loving American Vandal. I haven’t had the attention span to binge watch anything (lol, or even get through an hour and a half long movie) but I breezed through season 2 today. This type of dry satire is my jam!
Needing this period of feeling a little blue to go away already. I think it’s the weather + my period compounded by some things that aren’t going my way that’s making me all melancholic.
Playing so much Stardew Valley. I go through intense periods of letting a game ruin my life for a couple of weeks, and then get over it only to pick it up in a few months and repeat the cycle. Right now that’s definitely Breath of the Wild. I’m kind of sick of running through grass for hours on end, avoiding the big bosses. I haven’t touched Super Mario Odyssey since I bought it, but I know it’s only a matter of time so I don’t feel too bad that it cost me the most money of all the games I bought so far.
Reading this excerpt from Lethal White and I’m annoyed at myself that I respond so well to literary chivalry when really this central character, in hindsight, is kind of garbage. I’m rereading (lol, re-listening to the audiobooks) the first three and JKR is such a mess, tbh. Woman hates other women, it’s kind of appalling. Why I continue to patronize this kind of content? Probably because I don’t love myself enough. At least I’m self-aware about it?
Thinking of just straight-up skipping church even though it’s literally in 5 minutes and I made a show of standing up from my desk when dad poked his head through, but now I’m still just blogging. I was also thinking about other profound things like whether or not I really want a family, or I’m just conditioned to want a family, and whether or not I should’ve chosen a more conventional life so I could’ve been cash-rich and I might be traveling right now.
Wanting for it to already be Tuesday, but a Tuesday where everything beforehand actually went according to plan.
Watching American Vandal, which is great!!! I also watched the season finale of Take Two and aside from converting me into a thirsty Eddie Cibrian fan, I think the show is just the kind of bad and cheesy I love in my procedurals. I also watched a bunch of Oscar-hopeful movie trailers and I actually cannot wait for The Favourite, and I think Green Book and BlacKkKlansman might be fun. Of course, knowing me, I probably will never get around to watching any of these because I haven’t even seen Black Panther— this is how behind I am.
Wearing yoga pants and a sports bra.
Wishing for nothing, really. I guess I just wish I’m not obligated to go to church on the Sundays I don’t have anything better to do. Normally I’d just get lost, but it had been raining and I didn’t feel like going out of the house at all.
Writing a review on this show I saw that I was very surprised went down the way it did, but only because I give everyone a benefit of the doubt. If I didn’t do that, I wouldn’t be so shocked, I suppose.
P.S. Wondering if in some time in the future these rants are going to bite me in the ass one day. I hope not! I think I’ve been very genuinely benign if not downright basic so far!
The Sunday Currently originated from here.